I have been thinking about how easy it is to judge others. You see something and then jump to a conclusion or think worse of that person. I wanted to share some alternatives which may be going on behind the surface. If you see someone on crutches then you understand why they are limping but when you are looking at someone with mental health issues you have no idea what pain they are suffering. Most people try and hide it and carry on as ‘normal’ but not far beneath the surface their thoughts are telling a totally different story…
For instance here are 10 possible scenarios:
1. Perhaps the person who looked at you in the wrong way was having a really bad day, had some bad news or was battling with their mind monkeys so hard that they had no space in their head to smile.
2. Perhaps that person who is stood in the corner looking miserable is not miserable but suffers from shyness and can not initiate conversations themselves.
3. Perhaps the person who turned up late suffers from social anxiety and was stood outside the door plucking up the courage to enter.
4. Perhaps the person who was late suffers from driving anxiety and spent ages working up the courage to start the engine.
5. Perhaps the ‘flaky’ person feels like they are already letting everyone down, including themselves, and probably feels like people would be glad they didn’t turn up or that know one cares enough to notice.
6. Perhaps the mum screaming at their kids has had enough after a full day of keeping it together during back to back demands and tantrums and no sleep the night before.
7. Perhaps the person who is shutting you out is doing it out of fear of being hurt and seems easier to push everyone else out than be rejected themselves.
8. Perhaps the person who looks like they are ignoring you is battling back the tears and knows a conversation with anyone would set them off.
9. Perhaps the person who is cutting you up on the road has heard their loved one has been taken into hospital and just wants to get there as quickly as possible.
I have fallen short of thinking the worse over the years and I am also guilty of doing most of the things above. I am sure I am not alone.
What I wanted to ask is that next time someone does or says something which does not feel right to you.. don’t automatically slap on a harsh judgment about them. Extend some kindness and give them the benefit of the doubt. It is not easy at times but I want to try harder. This is a tough world we have to navigate with all the social media and noise out there and we need to stick together as apposed to ripping each other apart. The kinder we are to each other the more space we create for happiness to spread.